June 13, 2008

Mentos: The Repulsemaker

Is anyone else nauseated by the Mentos commercial where the chick drinks out of the guy’s mouth like he’s a water bubbler? The whole point is that they’re supposed to be “mouthwatering,” but there’s a big difference between drinking water and drinking spit, and that’s not gonna be seen as refreshing, no matter how hot the chick is.

It has decided by turns to be fantastically hot or pouring down rain, depending on the whim of the weather faeries. I dunno if there’s a gang war going down with them or what, but I’ve got a headache the size of Maine from sitting in the neutral zone. I have to run later, and I’m not sure who I want to be winning when I get out there; fingers crossed for a cloudy, 40-minute truce.

All those mourning my loss at their local Starbucks can rejoice, as I will have to remain a barista for the foreseeable future, as the raise I had been expecting turned out to be more of a mild upward lift. Good thing I don’t have any major money-sucking ventures on the horizon, or I’d be in big trouble. I’d try to be a little more angry about this, or at least go into some particulars, but it’d be about the 50th time I had the conversation and… I’m just so tired, you guys.

I’m sorry all I can do is more whining, again, redux. I am sorry that all this up-in-the-air bullshit is making me tetchy and mean. I’m sorry that my friends are emotionally holding my hair back while I explore the fatal dosage of sarcasm. I’ve had so much to think about lately, it’s like I’ve been carrying a backpack full of boxes, all corners poking out and fraying the canvas. At first it was digging into my shoulders and giving me Indian burn, but now it’s hot, and it’s heavy, and it’s hard to do anything else. I need to put all this shit away, but barring that, I’d really like to set it down. For five minutes. I’m just really tired.

Give me the weekend; we’ll see what I can do.

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