April 15, 2008

Timeline*

Okay, so there comes a time in the lives of every man when she realizes that she hates her job, her peers, and by extension her very being.** I have not hit this point yet, but I see it glowering on the horizon, and it’s time to do something about it other than burying myself under blankets with a stuffed leopard over my head because, while fun, that doesn’t seem to be helping. I start the way any self-respecting nerd-girl would; with a list.

1. Somewhere here, I need to get more sleep.

2. This weekend, using receipts, hangers and several accumulated piles of detritus, I plan to MacGyver myself a bedroom.

3. I might possibly have a caffeine addiction. I need to make a plan for cutting that back. Slightly. I’ll need another list.

4. Promotion at work going well so far. Need to make another list about when it is appropriate to ask for raise.

5. Rewrites on novel’s first draft slated for May 1, meaning I’ll be a proper basket case just in time for the hottest days of summer.

6. Retool two short pieces for online submission before Friday. Try to prop eyes open for this.

7. Resist reading all about cheesemaking.

8. Or cheese in general.

I have to get this book written. It’s ridiculous, the number of days you can put off doing something important for a little thing like being paid. These days are called a calendar.

On a not-at-all-related note, I was reading something in Writer’s Digest about competing religious non-fiction titles and was intrigued by a comment in defense of The Dawkins Delusion that the author “put a lot of time and effort” into his book. Now, completely outside the argument at hand, I would like to say: Yes, lots of good things happen when people expend time and effort. But… you know what also requires time and effort? Ethnic cleansing. Labor intensive is not always equal to a positive result. Sometimes you get houses for the homeless, and sometimes you get the Creation Museum. “Yeah—I burned down seven orphanages! Woot--give it up! C’mon, it took me ALL DAY!” Man, specious arguments give me the itch.

All this is by way of saying: Laziness is the least of a whole host of evils.

* No, not the book; although it really wasn’t bad. The movie, on the other hand...
** Maybe it’s not as bad as all that. Maybe it’s just the psychotic ramblings of my special moon-time. In any case: not famous. Must fix.

4 comments:

mamaclsn said...

Maybe you should visit the Creation Museum.

Sarah Beedoo said...

I should. Although I did go on the virtual visit and enjoyed it immensely.

Joy said...

Sarah, that link is AMAZING. Dann and I have been laughing for the past half hour. As one commenter said:

"The stupid, it burns."

Anonymous said...

I hope you're happy, I've ruptured my spleen laughing.
G